Spirit gives you spontaneity in which you are the master. You are the master of yourself, complete master, no enslavement of any kind, no habits formation coming. All habits drop out. You become so spontaneous that I don’t have to tell you. You just drop out all habits and you become a master of yourself. That should happen to you. Instead of that, if you indulge into things which enslave you, you will like it for a while because you can’t help it. But if really sit down, you will know that it’s not the thing that you wanted. You wanted to be the master of yourself.

Now here in this map as is shown, we have two powers, left and right powers. The left power is the power that gives us conditioning: left side, the subconscious, the collective subconscious. That gives us the conditioning. Now, if you try to deny all that, then the right side is even worse. It gives us action, but with action we can become very ego oriented. So both ways it can be troublesome. Supposing you say that “All right, I have no conditioning of any kind. What’s wrong in doing this? What’s wrong in doing that?” And if you just move with that idea, with that freedom, it will be abandonment, it may not be freedom. Because freedom must have wisdom behind it. So both the sides, the movements on both the sides, are wrong. So what is all right? In the center. Is not to get conditioned by anything and not to be ego oriented. But how to do it is the problem. The problem is how to do it. To be spontaneous is to be absolutely free.

Now I would consider these two powers as, say, a brake and an accelerator in a car. Now you use both the powers. You use the brake first; you use the accelerator; you try to control these two powers. But, first of all it is difficult to understand how you are to use these powers. Gradually, with practice, you use, you know how to drive the car, you become the good driver. After becoming the good driver, still you are not the master. But then you become the master. So, today the master within us—within us—is the Spirit. But before realization, we are not the master because the master has not come in our conscious mind. It is not expressing in our conscious mind. In the sense that we are not empowered by its powers.

The Spirit exists; it has its own powers, but we haven’t felt those powers within us. Once we feel the powers of the Spirit, we are empowered by our own powers which are there. The powers are within us. These are our own powers. We don’t have to borrow from anyone, ask from anyone, they are in ourselves. The Spirit is within us; only thing that Spirit has to give light in our consciousness. It has to come in our consciousness. In simple medical terminology, we can say that the Spirit must manifest itself in our central nervous system.

This is what happens, that on your finger tips you start feeling and understanding what is reality, what is beauty, what is joy, what is love. This is the left side which we get, and ultimately with these left side problems we get physical pains.

It’s very painful to have left-sided problems—it’s very, very painful. The pain cannot be explained; no one can understand; nobody can cure it; you can’t tell anyone; and people think that you are fussing; they give you psychological treatment. You just don’t understand why this pain is within you. And this pain comes to you from left side: the subconscious. Beyond the subconscious is the collective subconscious, and this collective subconscious is the one where whatever is created from the beginning up to today in the creation is within you. And once you go to the subconscious, you just get lost there. You are so overpowered by this power of subconscious that it is beyond you to understand it, beyond you to get out of it, and beyond you to not to succumb to it. And it goes on increasing.

Like I asked some people, “Why did you go on doing it when you knew that you were not doing it, somebody else was doing it? Still, why did you continue to do it?” They said, “Mother, we were under a blanket; it was darkness; we didn’t know where we were moving and were just going on and on and on.”

And as I told you last time, feeling guilty is the biggest blockade. Is the biggest blockade because once you start feeling guilty, this center on the left gets blocked and it’s very difficult. And you don’t know why you are feeling guilty. All the time you’re feeling guilty but you don’t know why you’re feeling guilty, why these ideas of guilt are coming to you, that this feeling of guilt keeps you away from joy, from enjoying anything, from being spontaneous. Why? And this explains why we sometimes are miserable for nothing at all. Actually, God has not created us to be miserable. He has made us so beautifully, so carefully. He has created us with such love and compassion, not to make us feel miserable, not for anything. He doesn’t give us any diseases, no problems. But we have done these things to ourselves by going to extremes on the left or the right.

As I am today talking about only on the left, I would say that to feel miserable for nothing at all is also wrong, is being unjust to yourself. The people who are left-sided must know that they are the Spirit, that they are that beauty which has to come, which has to express itself. That they are not the people who have to suffer all the time and to live like miserable people. They are not. But, because they take so much upon themselves, bear so much upon themselves, they become like that. And to avoid that bearing up they may take to some other habits, you see. Many people take to alcohol, also, for reason because they can’t bear the pangs of life, they can’t bear it. That’s why they take to it. But once the Spirit is awakened within you, you become so strong, you become so joyous, so spontaneous that all these things drop out, all those things—so-called diseases, so-called habits—just drop out, and you become a new, blooming personality.

Now the basis of having this center within you—you can blame God for that. Why did He give us these centers on the left hand side, what was the need? He should not have given these left-sided ones, so we would have been just in the center to go. But the trouble is, the human beings have to know, in their own freedom, how to deal with themselves. They have to learn little hard way the wisdom. They have to know by going to extremes they have suffered. They have to realize it because if they have to become truly, absolutely free they have to rise in their wisdom.